Common Courtesy

Courtesy is no longer common which is a sad reflection on our modern society. It is a rarity today to hear a child saying “Thank you” in a tone of voice which implies that the phrase is meaningful to both the giver and the recipient.

I like to think of courtesy as being ‘bread upon the waters’. You never know when it will be repaid. The opposite is also true in that discourtesy will come back to bite you.

Way back in the 1960s my father had an office in Cavendish Square behind John Lewis in London. There were no parking meters or traffic wardens in those far off days and cars would be double- or even triple-parked around the square. There was a wonderful doorman guarding the entrance to the seven offices at 19a, Cavendish Square – Mr Taylor. He wore a long black coat, black shoes, pinstripe trousers and a top hat. He was the epitome of courtesy.

Whenever I parked my old banger outside the building Mr Taylor would ask for the keys so that he could move the vehicles about as parking spaces became available. He would always ask when I needed to use the car again so that it was accessible on my return. One afternoon a client of Lew Grade, the theatrical impresario, arrived in his Rolls Royce and proceeded to park it against the kerb. Mr Taylor approached him to ask for the keys but the man, in a particularly lofty manner, refused to hand them over saying that he was only going to be there for an hour or so. You did not do this to Mr Taylor.

Two hours later the client returned to his car which, by this time, was hemmed in by cars in front, behind and alongside the Rolls. He snapped his fingers at Mr Taylor and instructed him to move the offending vehicles so that he could get his own car out. “Sorry, sir, they never left me the keys” came the reply and the Roller was trapped for a further five hours!

Courtesy is not a matter of doffing one’s cap – very few men wear them nowadays – but simple consideration of other people’s feelings. Holding a shop door open for a following customer, offering to pick something up dropped by an arthritic pensioner, letting a driver out into your line of traffic or complimenting a stranger on their choice of clothes can generate a feel good factor in oneself. When was the last time you offered to carry a heavy shopping bag for an old lady when you had just popped into the supermarket for a newspaper? Try it and you will find sunshine come into your life. Let’s make courtesy more common.